2018年01月20日 雅思写作范文解析

小作文

类型

线图

题目

范文解析

本次小作文是一个动态的线图。注意主要信息点总体趋势，极值和数据的对比以及时态的表达方式。

高分表达（范文中已用红色标注）

 how many visitors from North America and France travel to UK for doing business and for taking a holiday in one year

在一年中 有多少来自北美和法国的游客去英国做生意或度假。（用宾语从句改写题目，注意下句型的转换）

It is noticeable that

值得注意的是

in contrast to

相比于

with the peak at roughly 0.35 million and just 0.2 million separately in October or so.

两者在十月份最高点分别是。。。 （独立主格）

范文

The line graph illustrates how many visitors from North America and France travel to UK for doing business and for taking a holiday in one year.

It is noticeable that the number of visitors from North America and France who take a vacation in UK is equal at only approximately 1 million in January. Since then North America enjoys a jump until July while France increases slowly but in this month, as many as around 3 million travelers from North American come to UK, in contrast to only 1 million France visitors. By contrast, figures for both areas afterwards have dropped back to merely some 1 million again in December.

similarly, both regions also follow a similar pattern in the number of annual visitors for business. From around 0.15 million and about 0.05 million respectively in January, figures for these two regions saw a slight fluctuation across the whole year, with the peak at roughly 0.35 million and just 0.2 million separately in October or so.

Overall, the number of visitors from North America is higher than that of France for business and holiday, although both share a similar trend during the one-year period.

范文来自邢睿赢老师~

字数

195words

大作文

类型

广告类

题目

People are surrounded by advertising. This both affects what people think is important and has a negative impact on people’s lives.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

范文解析

本题讨论广告是否不仅影响人们认为重要的事情而且还对人们的生活产生负面影响。题目类型是议论文的一种观点类是To what extant do you agree or disagree类型，可以采用双边讨论，也就是5段式作文。

文章结构

P1：引入话题+表明观点（不同意）

P2：承认公益广告的益处：更快更广泛地传递一些公众问题。

P3：指出广告的弊端： 对人们的一些想法有负面影响。

P4：指出广告的弊端：会浪费消费的金钱。

P5:总结：重申观点

高分话题表达

 is bombarded with

注重个人形象的

non-commercial issues

非商业问题

more often than not

经常

deforestation

森林砍伐

induce

引诱

top fashion model

时尚超模

are barraged with

连续炮击

lure

引诱

excessively

过度地

impulsively

冲动地

Live up to

达到

高分结构

though informing consumers of more useful information

 让步状语从句的省略

 take a heavy toll on

对...有负面影响

So powerful is this media that

 倒装结构

thus misleading them to expect an unrealistic , unattainable image.

非谓语结构做结果状语

not only Disney videos, products as well as clothing but other ideas,

Not only…but also 的平行

This is primarily because

这主要是因为

范文

Almost every single individual in today’s society is bombarded with different advertising from children’s programs on Saturday morning to talk shows and prime time TV and most of us has get used to it. However, though informing consumers of more useful information, advertising in most cases take a heavy toll on them.

Some public service advertising could motivate and educate the general public to pay attention to non-commercial issues such as AIDS, deforestation, family planning, etc. So powerful is this media that it is capable of reaching every corner of the world as fast as it can and of publicizing different significant ideas to all people. However, this is not that simple in reality as advertising more often than not mainly functions as a tool to advertise the availability of a product or service and to induce consumers to buy products and to increase sales.

Advertising delivers a false image and therefore influence how people think about themselves- often in a negative way. For adults, based on the images they see in advertisements, women may feel they should be thin and beautiful just as the top fashion model, thus misleading them to expect an unrealistic, unattainable image. Without it, they will become frustrated and less confident and this exert a detrimental effect on their health. For children, they are barraged with not only Disney videos, products as well as clothing but other ideas, like the notion that every little girl should be a “princess”, an impractical expectation that lures them to excessively emphasize appearance.

Direct-to-consumers advertising also results in wasting dollars. This is primarily because in order to tempt consumers to purchase, manufacturers often idealize their products, such as some beauty and health products but minimize their side effects. Most consumers may try and purchase them impulsively even by a higher price but this always ends with failure as these products hardly live up to their promises and finally are thrown away. 

In conclusion, informative as advertising proves to be, it does pose risks to people’s mind and finance. But it is still necessary in people’s lives and the key is how to use it critically.

范文来自邢睿赢老师~

字数

340 words